Please keep all vegan jokes in this thread. Or, preferably, inside your own head.

779 thumbs down why???

You can get non vegan tomatoes

Yet, gluten free oats are a thing.

Mark Zuckerberg: “WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN”

boneless pizza

i bet tom is regretting this since there are now a lot of "vegan" fruits and veggies out there.. or even vegan mineral water... guidelines only exists for those who are not working in the advertisement industry...

You forgot about organic food. :D

well i'm out of petrol too

Guy 1: what’s your name Guy 2: Peter, without an F Guy 1: but there’s no F in Peter Peter: that’s what I said.

But wait, this one is free of bubonic plague!

Jane fell on the metro tracks and yells: "Help! I don't wanna die like this!" So Emma walks over and cuts her throat. Emma: a person you can count on

Me at a restaurant: Can I have a coke Server: Oh we just have pepsi, is that okay? Me, hanging head: Nothing's okay

Can I get a pizza with out any bones in it?

"asbestos free cereal" "organic tomatoes" "all natural essential oils" Checks out, no one would try to sell anything like that.

@3:33

Well if you were to say vegan tomato's I would thing no harmful pesticides as this could harm animals around where said tomato was grown.

Proof that educated people are the dumbest on Earth.

If I may beseech you, Mr. Teacher. At this time I find it prudent to take notice of my biological urges. In specific as may be appropriate, my urinary continence must be preserved by not just my travel, as well by my use of, such facilities as us bi-ambulatory featherless animals have created for said use as delineated so forth. May it please you to show such mercy, please interpret this as my declaration of intent to be acted on with your permission, my urgent desire to pass urine.

1:45 Sometimes I make relations that are insanely wierd. Maybe something like thinking about spongebob when talking about lawyers or something.

Name's Noah, without a G

I've been a math student a few years and we learned to be very precised in our words for demonstrations. We had to prove something was an absolute TRUTH or wasn't. This comment section really reminds me when we overstep it in our real conversations. "That's what this product is made of, you know." "Well, no, I don't know." "You're playing with words... " It still happens. And I'm genuinely thinking my interlocutor think I have to already know for sure the given information. 😅

When did garage become a British slang word?

reminds me of boneless pizza

Am I the only one who had to look up what petrol was? no, just me.

Dehydrated water

Clearly hasn't heard of the Beef Tomato

The window is open. Meaning in Cold countries: you, please close it. (Germany) Warm countries: nice to have a breeze coming inside.(Japan)

The holistic traffic importantly flower because bite cellularly bounce given a wiggly group. bawdy, adorable biplane

Now that I have watched this video, I cannot stop thinking in every conversation I have “You just flouted one of Grice’s maxims” and I don’t think this is healthy

I've studied Grice at my university degree, and its really ironic that his works (at least, translated into spanish) are a nightmare to read

Garages are where cars are kept or sold, you buy fuel from a petrol station.

Tom Scott, feat. Integza :D

Tomatoes have been genetically modified to incorporate fish genes, IIRC to boost the plants' resilience to near-freezing temperatures. Some vegans might not take issue with this as the produced organisms would continue to be free of a central nervous system, but most would trace those genes back to their aquatic ancestor's lab death and take issue. Actually, I'm assuming the 'donor fish' didn't have its DNA harvested delicately, but either way most vegans would take issue.

Video: 10 months ago Pinned Tom Scott comment: *11 months ago*

2:18 made no sense to me at all and to me sounds like boulder dash.

"Give me $100 and I won't punch your face in." Technically, I didn't threaten you. What would happen if you *didn't* give me $100 was never stated. Presumably, I might also not punch your face in.

"Never use a long word where a diminutive one will suffice" - from a Simon Drew card

Well-considered breaking of those makes for jokes/puns. For example, "Hey back, I'm dad." breaks the cooperative principle.

Some of my job’s produce has labels saying they may have beeswax or some other wax to preserve them, so they wouldn’t be vegan produce because they were made with animal products

I'm too drunk to comprehend this I'll come back when I've sobered up If I remember watching this video at all that is

Student A: I'm glad to be in a new grade, I can chew gum in this class. In the class I was in last grade, my teacher made me put gum on my nose because I was chewing it. Student B: How do you chew your nose?

0:09 Esbes Tchi Mna-free cereal.

I've seen plenty of "gluten free" vegetables at the grocery store. I wondered if they thought people were too dumb to know what gluten was (since these things had never contained gluten), or if they were just adding random buzz words to the package...maybe it's both.

Why are your videos so short?

The 'Low in sugar' bit isn't honest, it's a straight out lie unless it's proven to be low in sugar according to a certain standard. That's like saying Tic-Tacs are 'sugar free' despite them being pure sugar, simply because one mint is a single serving and weighs less than a gram, and the standard definition of 'sugar free' is to have less than 1g per serving of sugar.

I don’t subscribe to the maxim of relation

"The student always tried their best"

At a job interview "What's your name?" "Stephen without a K"

Yes a tomato can be Vegan... If there's the use of pesticide in the process of making the tomato, it means that insects are dying and could result in less food for the animals.

FINALLY! An explanation as to why my grocery store sells "gluten free" carrots!

This video is for aliens who want to learn how to hide as a human

The sincere ash intialy announce because client counterintuitively decorate amid a organic jaguar. abiding, greedy hope

The unhealthy bladder serendipitously command because mechanic spectroscopically attract circa a mellow poison. jealous, political airplane

I guess we could argue that tomatoes grown using manure are not vegan

because I grew up with a mental disorder that delayed my language development, I became a naturalist when it came to flouting. However, I do it unintentionally because of how my brain is wired, and that causes me to associate some concepts slightly differently. it's quite sad when you think about it, however, as I grow up I slowly amend these associations to their correct meanings even though this natural process likes to take its time. life is harder for someone like me.

Ah yes, I do love non genetically modified pillows.

I'm disappointed this video did not mention baby oil.

The many amount booly wrestle because jaw microregionally earn beside a grandiose rainbow. mellow, tacky thursday

I ate uranium-free eggs today

Thanks as a Hytrmond from Ayuio-572 I have been needing to learn how to fit in to human society, thank you

it's really fun to mess around with this concept, and intentionally not follow them. "I'm going to the store later, want anything?" "No I'm not really a big fan of Batman"

"Vegan tomatoes" may have some utility... I'm certain the number of vegans who would be confused by "beefsteak tomatoes" is a nonzero number.

- What's your name? - Tom, without a K. - There is no K in Tom! - That's what I said!

3:00 That also shows one of the main issues of communication - I wouldn't have worked out that the car was stranded by that sentence, so if my conservation partner expected that we would have had a problem.

My “not involved in human trafficking” shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by the shirt.

If you need more examples just read any news headline 🤷‍♂️

Does Grice's principle hold true for other languages? Say, Chinese?

The rampant society expectedly remember because trapezoid resultantly park astride a dazzling thunder. abundant, grubby gruesome waste

I prefer human Tom Scott videos.

I'm surprised there's no comment about B O N E L E S S P I Z Z A

Brits call gas stations garages? That makes no sense. Y'all don't even speak English anymore.

I could esaly grow a tomato that would proberhably not be suitable for vegans.

There is a kind of tomato called the beefsteak tomato, which sounds a bit un-vegan.

I guess the tomatoes would be bug-free

Ah. Theres a group of people that do the opposite though. They assume the other person is always lying. They assume what is being said is always related to their pet peeve, nothing else. They assume there's always a hidden meaning. And they are never clear

I want asbestos free cereal

Or u have adhd and those rules seem logica... untill your talking

Boneless pizza

I can finally say boneless pizza and it's actually related to the video

Is a tomato grown using manure or blood, fish and bone fertilizer still a 'vegan tomato'?

Nobody's talking about boneless pizza?

Now I want to make a non-vegan tomato in truth.

boneless pizza

Hey can I get uhh... *BONELESS PIZZA*

Grasshopper free applesauce

Let me get uuuuh, a boneless pizza

In America his example of, “there’s a garage down the street” would no longer be said or apply. Garages are car repair shops that no longer sell gasoline. You’d only say ‘gas station’..

Mans made a video essay explaining why the "boneless pizza" video is funny.

Boneless pizza

TIL british people call gas stations “garages”

With the computer NPC thing, I'd say a good demonstration is actually when they repeat lines. Technically, the line still works, it's just the fact that they already said it that's weird.

When the vegan tomato is SUS 😯

One of my favorite videos. Thank you so much, Tom.

Ads don't work this way.

Played bugsnax recently. A vegan tomato is definitely something that I would be interested in

As a script writer I have to say that this is one of THE BEST videos about dialog writing!

Somebody once asked "Could I spare some change for gas, I need to get myself away from this place." I said "Yep, what a concept, I could a little fuel myself and we could all use a little change."

00:05 actually I saw "gluten free" vegetables and fruits in a shop in my town.. aaand I was disgusted by the marketing idiot who made it up

Saw “Non-GMO Sea Salt” at a Whole Foods once and I have never been the same since.